Visiting Toronto 2023

 

March 26, 2023

I just am getting home from getting my kids from their fathers. I went to Toronto, Canada yesterday. I left my brothers at 6 am. I was held up at immigration again for about 30 minutes. It was early in the morning

March 27, 2023

They asked me question’s about where I was visiting. I told them Toronto. They had me sit down and wait. A little while later I was called into a interview room where they went over my back ground check and asked me questions. I was arrested in 2008 and put on probation due to stealing and they asked about that. They asked what I was going to do in Toronto and asked me if I was going to see anyone. I stated no I was going to visit and see tourist things. Try and go to CN tower. The guy stated that it I understand why they are questioning me and told him yes because as a single female woman traveling it is not common. He said ok and stamped a paper and said I was good to go. So on I went and headed towards Toronto. Below I have added pictures of the paper from 3/11/23 when I first tried to go and then from 3/25/23.

I got on the freeway and drove for over an hour. In Canada they use kilometers and liters. Basically, its almost only in the US that we use gallons and miles. I have tried to learn Celsius because they use that as well and we use Fahrenheit. Its confusing lol but I need to learn Europe does the same thing. I stopped in London again at Walmart to use the bathroom and get a little bit of food for the road. In Canada they say washroom. Here is a picture below. I found a couple of good deals, so I got few things. Then I stopped for gas after it was raining and then back on the road to Toronto almost the entire way is just fields and farms basically. 

I continued my way to Toronto. It rained most of the way there. I passed a few towns on the way. Toronto is the largest city in Canada. I did not know this until 2 weeks ago and started learning more about Toronto. As I made my way closer to the city it was cloudy but something you see out of a movie it was so amazing, beautiful, so many buildings differently shaped. I was in awe.

I had no idea what I was going to do but I knew I wanted to see the CN tower, I didn't know where I was going to park but I often go places without making plans. I just go and plan as I go most of the time. Once in the city I found a parking structure. Expensive but I needed to stretch, and it was quick access to the CN tower and other tourist activities. Once I parked, I got ready and took a picture of where I parked once I was almost at the elevator, I remembered I needed my umbrella as it was raining so I turned around and went to grab it then I set out again for my adventures. 

I walked a little and boy was it cold and raining It wasn't long until I walked by the train station so I went inside to warm up use the bathroom and I found the subway while inside as well so I got me a card to ride and went on one going North as I like to see the views. At first I couldn't see anything because we were underground. However, after a bit we finally came above ground although it was raining I could see a little bit we went past this huge mall with a large parking structure. After riding for a bit I decide I want to get off and try to walk around a bit. However once I got out I felt like I was in a secluded area so I got back on the subway going south. 

So I continued. A little further in the city then I decided I wanted to walk some so I got off and walked it started raining again lots of people were out walking many without umbrella's some were riding bikes, there were deliver guys on scooters, something I seen a lot in Greece and Albania. I saw a mall with lots of stores, but I wanted to keep walking so I continued sightseeing. 

Then I got cold so I went inside and it turned into the mall that was like a block long 3 floors or something, had a ton of stores. I walked around a bit and warmed up. Then I was hungry, so I had to make my way back. I then got on the Q-line to take my way back to my car. 

I finally made it to my car and warmed up, changed my socks as they had gotten wet. Then I ate some food I had bought from Walmart in London. 

After I ate and warmed up. I sought out more adventure. I walked around some.

I had a wonderful time and then was tired so I found a place to stay the night. The next morning, I had breakfast and then headed home. I was exhausted could wait to get home. I had to fill up as I almost ran out of gas but I made it I could see Detroit! 

I crossed the Ambassador Bridge anxious to get service again so I could see what time I was picking up my boys from their father. I made it and had to wait in line a bit. The line Canada was much longer I was glad I didn't have to go through that when I went over. So I pulled up as it was my turn I was asked how long I had been in Canada, what was my reason for visiting, put my back windows down, did I buy anything. The gentleman looked in the back of my car. He asked what I was doing in Toronto and if I was visiting anyone. Then he asked me to wait a moment and closed his window after a few minutes he handed me a slip and had me go through customs/immigration. I was getting frustrated because I wanted to text my children's father but I didn't have service as I pulled up I was going to take my phone but they told me to leave it. I turned off my car and opened my windows as instructed and got out of the car. There were two border patrol men. One of them told me to stand in front of the car. I took my keys, my car is a lifeline and I have other important keys I wanted to keep on me. One of the bp agents seen my hand in my pocket and asked if I had a weapon and put his hand on his hip. Im not sure if he had a gun it was all happening very fast, and I was frustrated. I told him it was my keys and pulled them out he was very on edge as was I. He told me to leave the keys in the car and I asked why can't I keep them and he was like why are you arguing? I stated I wasn't I was very upset by this time I dont fully remember what else was said but I put them back in the car and they said again to leave my phone and to go inside. So I went inside I was very irritable. The agent inside asked me how I was and I said I do not remember the word I used something like irritated and he said understandable, so I gave him my name and paper and he had me sit down. It was a small building with like 12 seats and then agents working behind like plexy glass like you see the set up almost at the secretary of state but they have like protection in front of them. Well a lady called my name up and asked me a bunch of questions I gave her my passport. What was I doing in Toronto, where did I go, where did I stay, did I bring anything back, was I visiting anyone, did I come alone? No one came with me?  As a single woman who love to travel it looks very weird to others sometimes. She asked me what I did for work.  Anyway she had me sit down and did stuff again probably for 5 minutes or so. Then she asked me for my driver's license I stated it was in my car, she asked that I go get it. When I went to leave a different guy who was straight up ass hole asked me what I was doing like he was guarding the door. I guess perhaps that is his job but I stated that I had to get my license from my car and he let me go with out saying anything. So I let the agents outside by my car know that I had to grab my license and I grabbed my wallet. Then went back inside and gave the agent lady my license and the address of where I lived and my phone number. I had to sit down again for probably around 10 minutes. Then she called me back with another female agent and said they had to do a pat down. I was wearing a winter coat. I was thinking ok a pat down to make sure im not carrying anything. As I am walking back with the two agents one in front of me and one behind I felt like a was in trouble and almost like in prison/jail because they do pat downs there. I remember thinking to myself I should just strip for them I have nothing to hide and they could see that. Mind you I was a bit confused and scared and anxious all sorts of feelings they took me down this long hall and told me to wait one moment I had unzipped my coat on the walk down. It was very clear they were being cautious of me in case I harmed one of them. It was worse than being arrested for stealing when i was 19 or 20. I set my wallet and passport cover down I don't really know why but it appeared that the agents did not understand ither but did not say anything. One of the agents unlocked the door and then told me to go inside. It was a very small room it looked like a cell with out a bed to me. Mind you I have never been in jail. It had a metal bench I set my coat on I was kind of confused the agent had gloves on I think they both did but I do not remember. She asked me to stand in the corner and put my arms up I was at the corner and turned to face them I was confused and I dont know what else the agent told me to turn around. I turned around and put my hands on the wall. She told me to spread my legs, I did and she told me to spread them further. She told me she was going to search me she started with my arms one one side felt for anything that should be there she came down to my shoulder then to my breast and I started crying but I held myself together. I didn't want them to see me cry. She kept feeling around my breast almost as if to look for a bra but I don't wear bra's anymore some I think that could have been different it just felt like a long time she felt around my belly and pulled down my waist area of my pants and to see if anything was hidden inside my pants and proceeding down my legs then she said she was going to check my other side. Again she started at my hand and moved down my arms and to my other breast and felt around a lot It was here where I completely lost it and started crying I couldn't hold it in I felt so violated. I have been sexually abused before. I remember shaking and I didn't want them to see me cry but I couldn't hold it in. The agent felt all around my breast and moved down my belly looking in my waist line and feeling down my leg. Then she stated that she had to feel my vagina area (honestly, I do not remember what she said) but then she felt around my vagina and it was so uncomfortable and she felt my ass crack. she then had me take off my shoes and she asked me to give it to her I handed it to her she searched it and then gave it back and then picked up my other shoe off the floor. I felt belittled, angry, furious, violated, so many feelings. I didn't say anything else I was trying to pull myself together. We walked back out to the lobby area they stated coming through a code they use to acknowledge they had a civilian with them. I went and sat down. I was crushed I love to travel and have been wanting to visit Toronto and Canada for a bit. I felt my innocence was taken away again. I was hurt even more that I was violated by a woman who was doing her job. I was mad at myself that I just didn't strip for them. It would have been way different. To be touched that way I can't even describe it because it hurts and I am angry. I was not ok, I am not ok with what happened. After like waiting for 10 minutes the lady called me up and said I was free to go I took my things and didn't say anything to her. I just wanted to get my kids and sleep. I didn't want to talk to anyone I was in shock the next day I was not ok I cried a lot. By Tuesday I forced myself to be around people to void out the pain and ignore it. I kept feeling her touching me in my private area's. It took some time but as of writing this blog as I finish it its now been almost two weeks. I am doing better.

Until next time world

Let the sun shine even in the darkest moments push yourself

Teela Love